Me, myself and I

The perfect gift to ponder apon

 

It’s really funny… Here I am sitting at a slightly crowded cafe by my self, thinking about everything that’s related to myself. I don’t do those normally, but tomorrow is my 25th birthday, and officially my second birthday in this foreign land I called home for the past 7 years (have been spending my birthday in my hometown during summer vacation when I was studying).

Anyways, here I am, alone with this cup of cafe latte on the table, thinking whether being here is a success or a failure.

I like the freedom I have here in Korea. Well, I’m am not talking about the freedom of time from work, frankly I don’t have those… But the freedom of doing anything I want, meeting the people I want.

To be honest, I came from a well lived family, didn’t struggle much in my life. But having to grow up in a fairly strict asian family, I enjoy the freedom that I had earn right now. Don’t get me wrong, I still respect my parents and love them very much.

But sometimes if you ask me, I would gladly choose freedom over family even though to get the freedom I need to sacrifice a lot.

Sometimes people can be very insensitive to others, thinking what they do is always right. The ever slight inconsideration can cause everything to go wrong in many situations.

On the other hand, when you are left all alone facing that world by yourself, the smallest consideration can go a very long way.

The human nature has always been like this: we never appreciate what we have in front of us, until we lose it. By then we only realize the importance of even the smallest things in our life.

Well, I like it this way. I’m far away from my family, so that I wouldn’t burden them, and I would appreciate them more since I would am not around them that often. Sacrificing that I gain my freedom while teaching myself to appreciate every little small things in life.

But it really tears me apart when I think of myself not being able to spend my time with my beloved ones, especially my grandmother that I love dearly. I guess I wouldn’t appreciate her as much if I’m beside her all the time.

Well in the end, all I have is an empty cup where I first had my cafe latte in. In the future when I look back, I hope I wouldn’t regret on the decision that I had made.

Happy birthday.